Nobody lives in a perfect house, and there’s always going to be something wrong with it. Whether it’s too small, too old, poorly decorated, in an area of town you don’t like, there’s never going to be a perfect house. Or, in our case, it was neighbors, or more specifically our neighbor’s dog that ultimately made us to decide to sell our house and move away. I know it sounds crazy but I think it’s a story worth sharing and one with a meaningful lesson that I learned, and perhaps that you will learn too. 

The situation

A few years back, we had been living in our current house for about 4 years, and felt it was time to make a move. We never intended that house to be our ‘forever’ house and had planned on getting a different house sometime in the future. Around that time, Mrs. Money was pregnant with our first (BabyMoneyFinance), and we decided that the time felt right to go ahead and make a move. 

It was a pretty competitive market back then, and we lost out on a few deals and were generally finding it difficult to find our desired house. Finally, after what felt like way too long, we found our next house! The house popped up on the market and we jumped on it right away. At this point we felt like we had our wish list and knew what we were looking for, so we made an offer! 30 or so days later we were handed the keys, scheduled the movers and moved on in! It was a beautiful house, and we loved it. It really felt like a house we could raise our kid(s) in – 4 bedrooms, a big backyard, 2 porches, am amazing master bedroom and bathroom, and a great kitchen. We were pumped!

I don’t remember exactly where I was when I heard the dog, but I remember very early on in living in our new house that I knew it was going to be a problem. I mean no one loves their neighbors, even if you’re living next to family or your best friend. So I wasn’t expecting to be best buddies but I did think that most people are generally nice and courteous, and that we’d have a good neighborly relationship with our neighbors. 

It sounds weird saying it out loud (or typing it in this case), but literally that dog drove us crazy. It was a big dog, with a loud bark, and it lived outside in the backyard 24/7. It was pretty skiddish, and would bark at pretty much anything; a squirrel, mail delivery, people coming or going, people walking by on the street, when we were playing in the backyard, or even when it was bored. It barked at all hours of the day, sometimes just a few barks, or other times for longer – like 20-30 minutes of STRAIGHT barking like it did when an opossum found it’s way into the backyard. The neighbor would essentially never bring it in, except at night for the winter months. 

Some days were worse than others, but on the whole, it really started wearing on us, me in particular. I would get woken up several times in the middle of the night, but it became something that neither music nor a white noise machine could cover for me. It of course affected Mrs. Money Finance, BabyMoneyFinance and even our dog wasn’t the same anymore. It was slowly but surely deeply starting to affect our mental wellbeing, and something had to be done. 

So what do you do in a situation like this? Well, first we tried simply asking. We had exchanged numbers with our neighbor and we would politely ask to have the dog brought in. We expressed that the dog was a nuisance to us and that it was not fair to keep it out all night while we lost sleep. We received few responses, aside from somewhat rude ones about us just minding our own business. We tried a barking control device, which claimed to emit a high-pitched sound that would train a dog not to bark. Turns out that specific dog wasn’t bothered by it, only our dog. We tried noise machines but the loud bark wasn’t drowned out by it. We then resorted to calling animal control, which directed us to the police. We then would call the police for noise complaints. Turns out if you don’t answer the door, there’s not much the police can do in a situation like this. We finally identified the specific city code – 15 minutes of barking with no more than a 30 second pause and recorded on our phones the violation. However, this requires you to actually go to court and appear before a judge, and when your neighbor is also an attorney, the judge conveniently overlooks or dismisses such violations. 

So, essentially we were losing to a bully. 

How we decided to try to sell

It was about a year into living there that Mrs. Money and I both admitted to how truly miserable we were. We were nearing our wits end, and felt like we had taken every course of action that we could. We dared to speak out loud what felt like the unthinkable – should we just move? 

Buying and selling real estate is a time consuming and costly process. Typically selling a home involve the seller paying a realtor fees, to the tune of 6% (3% to the buying agent, 3% to the selling agent). So, unless our house had appreciated (risen in price) by 6%, we would be losing money. That pained us both so much, not only was this bully winning, they were also forcing us to lose money as typically houses don’t appreciate that quickly. 

However, after an unseasonably warm winter, which meant the dog stayed out over night and thus kept us up more, we decided that it just wasn’t worth it. We only have one life to live and there’s no sense in being completely miserable where you are. A home is supposed to be a safe haven, a space where you can be yourself, unwind and relax. It got to the point where we dreaded being at home, and we’d find any excuse to get out of the house. 

We felt like we had tried everything we could think of and just realized that it wasn’t worth it anymore. Even if we lost some money, our sanity and happiness was worth more.

Why we haven’t looked back 

After several months of soul-searching (“are we really going to let a bully of a neighbor and their dog push us out?”) and a few months of wrestling with how much we could actually sell the house for, we gave it a shot. After a few hard months of first trying to do FSBO (for sale by owner, which would save us 3% by not paying a seller agent fee), we finally agreed to have a realtor help us out (who gave us a discount which was AMAZING), and had it properly listed. Oh, then COVID hit and this was early COVID when nobody really knew what was going on and everything was up in the air. Somehow the market was still hot enough and we finally found a buyer! 

We ended up losing a few thousand dollars from this whole experience. However, this whole experience really taught me that some things (like sanity, happiness and overall wellbeing) are worth it, and with only one life to live, it’s important to, as best you can, pursue things that will improve your life and bring you joy. Bullies suck, life can be hard, but it’s important to protect yourself and your family and sometimes it’s best just to walk away. We never wanted to be mean or play dirty, as that would involve us stooping to their level. We kept the high road and that helps me sleep so much better at night, along with not having a noisy neighbor dog! We’re so thankful and I remind myself everyday how grateful I am for our current living situation!